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The Real Reasons Behind Family Squabbles Over Elder Care

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Elder Care in Rancho Cordova CAElder-Care-in-Rancho-Cordova-CA

Working with a sibling in order to provide care for an elderly parent can rehash old feelings from your childhood. If you and your brother or sister fought, were jealous of one another, or thought your parent loved one more than the other, you may end up feeling like you did during this time in your life.

According to AARP and the National Alliance for Caregiving, 7 out of 10 caregivers claim a family member has offered to help from time to time, while one in 10 said that the caregiving responsibilities were shared equally. If you and your sibling have squabbled over the care of your loved one, it could indirectly affect the quality of care you are giving them. By understanding the reason behind your sibling fights, you may be able to find a solution that will work for both of you.

Reasons Behind Family Feuds

  • Rehashing childhood rivalries. As previously mentioned, working with a sibling could bring back a flood of childhood memories that may include crying, hair pulling, and pushing. Unless you can both sit down and discuss these feelings, you will never be able to resolve the various emotions you have with these memories.
  • Can’t agree on the senior’s health condition. Both of you may have noticed the same new symptoms in your elderly parent, but have very different ideas of what is wrong. This argument can also make it extremely challenging to provide the care the elder needs since both of you think the condition should be handled in different ways. You may also disagree over what the senior is and is not capable of doing, such as driving or cooking.
  • Unable to come to the same solution for the elder’s finances. Having a heated argument over who will handle the elder’s financial responsibilities can tear a family apart. Some of these disagreements may involve who is going to pay for the care of the loved one and who is going to take care of their bills.
  • One has more responsibilities than the other. A major feud can occur if one sibling has to do a majority of the caregiving responsibilities over the other one. This can create a huge burden for the primary caregiver to take on.

If you and your sibling are having a difficult time coming up with a solution to your disagreements, it may be time to bring in outside help. A home care provider can offer the elder the same amount and quality of care as family members, but with much less drama.

If you or an aging loved one needs elder care in Rancho Cordova, CA, remember Senior Home Care Services. Call us at (916) 514-7006 for more information.

 

Source: http://www.aarp.org/relationships/caregiving-resource-center/info-12-2011/siblings-disagree-on-parents-care.html

Jay Bloodsworth
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