Your senior might at some point make it crystal clear to you that she doesn’t want your help. You might worry that you’ve done something wrong or overstepped a boundary. What’s closer to the truth might be that having help from you triggers some emotions for her.
Offer Help Gradually and Subtly
It’s possible that your senior has refused your offers of overt help, but she might be more receptive to help that you offer in a more subtle way. Instead of trying to force it on her, allow her to gradually come to terms with the fact that you’re offering her help that she can use. If she continues to push back, you might have to step back again, but at least you’re trying.
Listen to Your Senior’s Feelings on the Issue
On that same note, it’s really important that you’re listening to what your senior is telling you about this situation. If she’s not willing to talk openly about her feelings and the reasons behind her feelings, you can still pay attention to subtle cues. If she’s continually refusing your help, there’s definitely a reason and if you’re patient enough she might even share that reason with you.
Remember She’s Dealing with a New Situation, Too
This can be an extremely new situation for your aging family member, too. She’s probably not used to needing more help from you and from other family members. Needing help at all can be a huge blow to her ego, especially if she’s someone who is used to taking care of other people. She might even be afraid of what this might mean for her both now and in the future.
Give it a Rest and Try Again Another Time
At some point you may run into so much resistance from your senior that you need to back away completely. If she’s becoming upset or you find that you’re becoming irritated, it’s definitely time to step back for a bit. You can always keep an eye on the situation and help in emergencies. Other types of help might need to wait a little longer.
If your elderly family member doesn’t want your help, she might be more open to help from other people. It’s definitely worth a try. Hiring elderly care providers can be a solution when your senior doesn’t want to lean on you. She might just see the relationship with you as something she doesn’t want to infringe upon, but other people are a different story.
Excerpt: It hurts to see your senior obviously needing help and yet refusing to allow you to help her.
If you or an aging loved one needs Elderly Care in Folsom, CA, remember Senior Home Care Services.Call us at (916) 514-7006 for more information.
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